I am Shubhangi Halande. Here is my story of death fear with my Sara, Jena, and Osho. Sara was my dog, but I prefer to refer to her as my baby; Osho and Jena are my puppies, whom I also consider my grandchildren. This memoir is my account of how I confront my fear of death.
Being Alone in a World of Hurt – death fear
There was a period when I felt entirely alone, not only because people had left me but also because I had left myself. The individuals I trusted the most, my family, wounded me in ways I never imagined.
Their harshness and assault broke me. Then I experienced numerous heartbreaks, including a violent relationship that nearly took my life. The anguish was so profound and real that I genuinely believed I would die from it.
death fear, and my soul felt shattered. I worried whether I would ever be able to find calm again.
It was difficult to breathe because I felt so lonely. I felt like I wasn’t there, even while I was amid a throng. I didn’t have any relatives or friends who truly understood me.
All I had were memories of people I once loved, which had turned into emotional scars. I felt sad and forlorn all throughout my body. I wondered whether I was worth anything and if I was even alive. At times, the torment was so bad that death felt like the only way out.
But in that dismal place, there was one little light: my dog, Sara. She was the only person I could talk to and the only thing that kept me going. She cherished him unconditionally.
She wasn’t concerned about my wounds; her only need was for me. And I knew that if I gave up, she would be alone and no one would care for her. That concept kept me going, even when I didn’t want to.
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The Moment of Truth: I Decided to Fight
Eventually, despite my fear of death, I mustered the courage to visit the doctor one day. I told the nurse how much I wanted to vanish as I was sitting in the clinic with tears flowing down my cheeks. I told him I couldn’t handle it any longer and that I was devastated, scared, and drowning in sadness.
But I still thought about Sara at that time. My love for her kept me going. And so I promised myself and her that I would fight. I fought not only for her but also for the faint hope that remained alive within me.
I began therapy, taking medicine, and doing something I didn’t expect: meditation. I learned to repeat 24 mantras every day at the ISKCON temple.
The repetition of the mantras calmed my thoughts and silenced the noise that had kept me awake at night. I gradually began to find peaceful moments amidst a sea of sorrow.
Getting Back to Life – death fear
I began to keep a notebook in which I wrote down what harmed me and what helped. I realized that the extent of my self-love, both past and present, influenced my recovery.
Sara’s presence kept me grounded. Her trusting gaze and gentle demeanor reassured me that not everything was lost.
Knowing that she needed me motivated me to get out of bed, even on the most challenging days. I started to notice little things that made me happy, like a blue sky, warm tea, or a nice remark from a stranger.
Death fear—these things became my anchors, showing me that life could still be lovely, even when it hurt.
The Pain of Losing Someone and Learning to Move On
I experienced a fear of death when Sara left me in 2022. It seemed like I lost a bit of my soul when she left. The sadness was overwhelming. I couldn’t do anything for days. She was everything to me—my friend and the reason I kept going.
But I held on to what she taught me in my heart: strength, unconditional love, and the ability to bounce back. I realized I had to deal with the pain instead of running away from it.
I went back to therapy and tried numerous methods to help me deal with it. And with time, I learned that life goes on even when you’re sad. It goes on, and so do we.
My grandkids, Jene and Osho (Sara’s pups), were like a fresh light for me. Their innocent playfulness taught me that love doesn’t cease when someone dies; it changes. They helped me get well by filling the hole that Sara left.
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What I Learned: Death Fear
1. “Love is a Lifeline”—
Sara rescued me when nothing else could. Animals don’t judge; they love unconditionally. That love may make the difference between giving up and fighting another day.
2. Healing Isn’t Straightforward—
Death fear: The pain comes back on certain days. But I know how to deal with it now: by going to therapy, meditating, and relying on the people who need me.
3. Purpose Keeps You Alive
Caring for something or someone, like a pet or a kid, provides you strength.
4. Grief doesn’t go away; it changes –
Sara’s loss broke me, yet her love endures. I love Jene and Osho with the same commitment as I do her.
5. You Are Not Alone
Even if you feel alone, there are those who understand. Get in touch. Tell your tale. Someone will pay attention.
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Final Thoughts about death fear
I am thankful for everything today. I don’t dread death anymore because I’ve realized that life isn’t about avoiding suffering; it’s about loving profoundly even when it hurts. It’s about being responsible and being there for those that need you, even while you’re still recuperating.
You are not alone if my tale speaks to you and you are facing your problems. I’ve been there. I’m still here. If you need someone to be there for you, I will be. Fight against the fear of death.
Go to https://bioandbrainhealthinfo.com/ And let’s make sure no one has to go through the process alone. We can all remind one another that hope still shines through even the darkest hours.
This message is for Sara, Jene, Osho, and anyone else who has ever felt broken but continued to persevere.
